Come As You Are
I’ve been putting off writing this for a number of reasons. First, I had put out multiple posts about hearing people’s experiences and opinions about what I’m about to talk about and I waited weeks to receive feedback. And I got nothing. So I decided just to say my mind anyways and I really hope it touches someone.
Also, the way I’ve been feeling lately is terrible. The best way to explain it is to give an illustration so here goes. It’s like I’m drowning, struggling to keep my head above board (I've used this illustration before, haven’t I?) and this time, I keep seeing a flotation device coming close to me. But each time it draws near, a wave comes and shifts it farther and then it comes close again and then the wave again and it just continues like that. And for everytime that wave shifts it far away, I lose the will to keep fighting to keep my head above water. But I’m not here to discuss my rapidly deteriorating mental health. I’m here to talk about talking about Jesus.
I heard the phrase “come as you are” during a church service where I saw someone wearing jeans and I thought to myself how brave they were because they were getting a lot of stares. I wished I could do that. Then I started thinking about why they were getting so many stares and how there seems to be an unwritten rule about the type of attire one can wear to church (asides from the obvious morally bankrupt ones). And then I heard the phrase “come as you are” very clearly and I started thinking about how a lot of people don’t know they can do this. Why aren’t we talking about this more?
Okay so as Christians, we have a mandate to spread the gospel and the good news. Problem is, we keep forgetting the good news part. Yes, hell is real, sin is bad etc etc but we forget to talk about God’s love for us. We forget to talk to people with love and grace and TACT. We get wrapped up in pointing out how our brothers and sisters in Christ are failing without addressing the root cause or taking the time out to be kind. We push people away with our words and methods and “brutal honesty”.
This brings us to the fact that a recurring argument for this behaviour is that we must tell ourselves the truth. But kindness and truth-telling are not mutually exclusive. In fact, I am of the opinion that a lot of people use “honesty” as a cover for being terrible people who lack tact and empathy. Colossians 4: 5–6 says,
“Live wisely among those who are not believers, and make the most of every opportunity. Let your conversation be gracious and attractive so that you will have the right response for everyone”.
Now I ask; if we cannot even talk to ourselves with love and kindness and graciousness, how are we supposed to talk to people who are not believers? I believe part of living wisely among those who are not believers is being of commendable example, which includes our speech. Let your conversations be attractive. Stop discouraging people from getting to know Christ with your words/attitude. I pray the Holy Spirit helps us figure out the right way to talk so we have the right response for everyone.
With all my love,
-B
